I'd had a reprieve of a few weeks from recruiter contacts for some reason, but it's over now. I've now had 5 this week already. I'm not looking for a new job, but that doesn't stop the emails. Usually they're pretty insipid and occasionally filled with marketing buzz words; but not today!
This is truly the most unique recruiter contact I have ever received:
Kyle!!!
So I was chillin in my office and eating this Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki sub from Subway... and BOOM. I came across your LinkedIn.
In a moment of OMG!!! - I dropped my sandwich.
But I picked it up (three second rule), pulled myself together and sent this email.
I know you've got a job and you're like "I don't want to talk to a recruiter... are you even a recruiter? You are just making me hungry by talking about some sandwich."
But don't you want to see where this email goes?
No?
Ok. 🙁
But I put so much effort into getting to know you!?!??!
Sooo you should checkout [Company Name Removed].
I usually try to stray away from bragging and throwing out arbitrary numbers in order to win you over (Links ftw). If you really care, you can go to [URL Removed] to learn more about us or you can read up on us using the Google.
More importantly, you should play around on our demo site: [URL Removed]
If you like it, and see some things you might want to improve or add, you should holler at me!
PS, there are actually specific reasons why I wanted to hit you up so if you have the time to be flattered, you should also hit me up.
Best,
[Name Removed]
Wow.
Do they work for Subway? 🙂
No, though I'm not sure if that would make it better or worse.